Paradise
by the.eye.does.not.SEE
Summary: Unable to face the day just yet, Lexie lets go, feeling herself float away from reality as she delves back into  her dreams, his arms, and her own private paradise. Mark/Lexie


_Title: Paradise_

_Pairing: Mark and Lexie (as always)_

_Author's Note: Apparently I now live to write dream sequences (and songfics)._

_Inspiration: "Paradise" by Coldplay._

_. . ._

_When she was just a girl_

_She expected the world_

_But it flew away from her reach, so…_

**_She ran away in her sleep,_**

**_And dreamed of_**

_Para—para—**paradise.**_

_Para—para—**paradise,**_

**_Every time she closed her eyes._**

_. . ._

"So here we are."

Lexie glances around, taking in the spacious room before her without answering. She can hear bags being set down by the door, and a second later it closes as the bellman wishes them a nice stay. Lexie looks around the impeccably cleaned suite, walking across the room to the wide glass doors on the right side. She slips off her shoes, pushes open the door, and steps out onto the cool sandy ground. The light breeze whips her dark hair around her face, and she's so focused on taking in her new surroundings that she jumps slightly when she feels an arm wrap around her waist. She can hear a quiet chuckle in his voice before he whispers, "It's just me," in her ear.

Lexie leans to the left, using his body to support hers. She takes a slow breath, inhaling the salty air. "It's beautiful here," she says, looking to her left and letting her eyes roam over the curiously deserted beach.

"It is," comes his quiet reply. He waits a beat before apologizing. "Sorry it's not warmer. I thought we'd be able to stay out in the sun today, but the concierge said it was probably going to rain soon."

Lexie shakes her head, letting it rub against his shoulder. "It doesn't matter." She looks up at him, smiling just at the sight of his face despite the rain clouds hovering above them in the sky. "We're used to rain, aren't we? And it's almost nighttime."

"We didn't come here for rain, though. We could have stayed at home for that."

Lexie nods, looking out to the sea and watching the waves crash. "I'm glad we came," she says, sighing contently as Mark wraps his arms around her. "Even though you're spoiling me to death with all this," she adds a moment later.

"Spoiling you?" He asks with a smirk, resting his chin on her shoulder. "Now why would you get that impression?"  
>She sighs, and just from that gesture, Mark knows she's rolling her eyes. He doesn't bother biting back a smile. "Maybe because there's no one else here," she answers.<p>

"The weather's bad," Mark replies. "Everyone else is probably inside—"

"Don't insult my intelligence, please," Lexie cuts in. "I know you made this private."

"The beach, yeah," he replies. "But that was included. We don't want random people parading past us at all hours of the day. And plus, there are plenty of other renters—"

"There was no one except the staff in the main building, Mark."

"And?"  
>"And that means you somehow thought it was appropriate to buy out this entire island."<p>

"You don't know that."

"Mark."

"What?" He asks innocently.

"Look. Unless you're some sort of movie star or heir to some prestigious royal family in Bavaria or something, you didn't need to do this."  
>"Bavaria doesn't have royalty anymore."<p>

"You did not need to do this for me," Lexie replies, enunciating each word.

He stares at her for a second before nodding. "You're right. Okay? You're right. No, I didn't need to do this. …But you know what?" He looks down at her, staring into her eyes. "I _wanted_ to."

Lexie sighs in exasperation, closing her eyes, but Mark could swear he saw a smile flicker on her lips before she made it disappear. "For me?" She asks before he can inquire, solidifying his hypothesis.

"Hey," he mutters, stepping towards her. "Of course it's for you."

"Why?" She whispers softly.

"Because it was a good deal," Mark replies automatically. "And I wanted to make this a worthwhile vacation." He tucks a couple strands of hair behind her ear. "Memorable," he smiles when looks over. She holds his gaze for a second before shaking her head with a good-natured smile.

"Fine," she concedes with a laugh. "At least I'll have an amusing time trying to weasel the price tag out of you," Lexie notes.

"I'm not sure you can count that high," he teases, ducking down to kiss her neck.

"If we're dirt-poor within a year because of this, I get to blame you for it," Lexie says, tilting her head so his lips have better access to her skin.

"Blame me all you want, but I won't be going anywhere, baby."

"I never said I wanted you to go anywhere." She takes one last look out to the blue ocean before turning within Mark's arms to look him in the eye. "Not without me."

He smiles, leaning down to kiss her before stepping back inside and holding out a hand. "So come with me, then," is his quiet reply. She takes his hand without hesitation, pulling the glass door closed behind them, and finding herself grateful for the seclusion no matter what the cost.

. . .

"What did I ever do to deserve someone like you?" The words are whispered against her shoulder, followed by a hand pushing the sleeve of her shirt away from her skin. "As my wife?"

Lexie grins at the title she's still happily trying to accept as her own, leaning into the kisses he places upon the curve of her shoulder while she speaks. "You know, I ask myself the same question everyday." She turns around, reaching up and wrapping her arms around his neck and holding him close. "What did I ever do to deserve someone like you?" She whispers as she steps forward. "As my husband?"

"Made all the wrong decisions, I'm sure," Mark murmurs with a smile, his own hands falling to her waist.

She shakes her head, looking up and holding his gaze firmly. "No," she replies seriously. Her arms tighten around the back of his neck, anchoring him to her. "I made all the right ones."

He leans forward, kissing her softly before pulling back. He rests his hands on her waist, rubbing small circles over her hipbones in a manner that leaves no room for her to imagine what's on his mind. "Want to make a few more good decisions?" He asks with a smile, already stepping backward and pulling her with him.

Lexie rolls her eyes with a grin, but goes along with him anyway. "You are just so smooth," she mocks with a smile, walking forward until the backs of his knees hit the edge of the bed. She continues walking even then, letting him fall into a sitting position on the bed as she straddles his waist, her knees bent on either side of his legs and her feet dangling off the edge of the comforter.

"What?" He smiles up at her, his eyes alight. "You weren't impressed with that subtle segue?"

"I would have been more impressed if you weren't already pulling me towards the bed as you said it. You," she points at him with an grin she doesn't even bother to conceal, "are anything _but_ subtle. You're nothing short of _un_subtle."

He gives her a small smile, reaching up and taking her face in his hands while simultaneously brushing her long hair behind her ears. "And you're nothing short of beautiful."

Lexie rolls her eyes again. "Oh, stop."

"What?" He smirks. "It's true."

"Stop being so corny. It's embarrassing."

"You love it. You're enchanted by me."

"I don't love it," Lexie replies, laughing at his word choice. "And I'm _embarrassed, _actually. _For _you," she adds with a smirk.

"You love it," he repeats.

"Do you think if you say that enough it will eventually be true?"

"Maybe."

Lexie shakes her head with a smile, instead focusing her attention on unbuttoning his shirt. Mark watches her for a moment before leaning away. Her eyes flash to his, confused, before he takes her face in his hands. "Wha—"

"Hey, it's worked before," he says softly.

"What are you talking—"

He smiles, and the gesture is small and sweet. "How many times did I say we'd get married?"

Lexie grins automatically; remembering all the occasions on which he'd mentioned their future and she thought it was nothing more than a joke or a teasing jibe to knock her off-balance. "Twenty?" She guesses, leaning back to rest her bottom on his legs but keeping her face within his reach.

"So you'll love me being corny, too," he concludes. Lexie studies him for a moment before a wide smile spreads across her face.

"Oh…" She drags out the word with a chuckle. "I get it now," she grins. "You _like _being corny. You like being stupidly romantic, don't you?"

"With you?" He clarifies, stroking her left cheek with his thumb. "Definitely."

"And here I've been called the 'pathetic' one," Lexie laughs. "I'd use the word to describe you as well, but it's just too much of an understatement to be useful."

"And now you're mocking me for loving you," Mark mutters, shaking his head in fake-disappointment. "I knew we'd never work out, with you punishing me for loving you."

Lexie grins, moving forward to kiss him quickly. She's about to pull back with a witty retort, but Mark had pulled her closer, his hands moving from her face to cup her back. She half-laughed into the kiss at his enthusiasm, but it soon died away as he leaned back against the bedspread, pulling her with him.

When Lexie manages to break the kiss and catch her breath a couple minutes later, all snaky comments have left her mind. There's only one thing she wants to say.

"I love you." She whispers it, almost nervously, as her hands rub the skin of his shoulders and neck in a continuous rocking motion. "And I'd never punish you for loving me back. Never." He smiles up at her, once again cradling her face in his hands and trailing his fingertips atop her soft, pale skin. His voice is soft and hushed when he replies.

"Then I love you back, sweetheart." He draws her face towards his, kissing her gently. "Don't ever doubt that."

. . .

_In the night, the stormy night, she'd close her eyes_

_In the night, the stormy night, away she'd fly_

_And dream of_

_Para—para—paradise_

_Para—para—paradise_

**_She dreamed of para—para—paradise._**

. . .

Lexie opened her eyes slowly, waking up in staggered steps, and taking in the dark room and empty bed beside her. She was back to reality, but still the dream stuck with her as if it had been a real memory. Even now, as most dreams escaped her these days, she could remember almost every detail of her most recent one. And as more and more came flooding back, she did her best to file them away and anchor them to places in her mind where she could always find them.

She remembered the way he'd held her and she'd held him, the way their bodies pieced together like a perfect puzzle, finally fixed. She remembered the pleasant weight of the gold ring on her finger and the accompanying feel of its twin resting on his hand. She remembered and could see the way his smile had stretched across his face, as if this had been the happiest he'd ever been. She remembered the way she'd looked into his eyes and realized she'd never met a more honest or loving man. No matter what anyone said about him, no matter what he did to her, she knew she'd always know who he really was. And she'd always love him for it.

Lexie knew that feeling was one thing that would never change.

She didn't even need to recall the way she'd felt her heart expand almost to the point of bursting with the love she was feeling for him nor make herself file it away. She felt it already, and had been feeling it now for some time now. It had been in the forefront on her mind since before she'd gone to sleep. It'd been there, lurking, for weeks and months, pushing its way to the surface like an illness you tried to beat back with fluid and extra sleep. But still it broke through, still it hung around. Still, it hadn't changed.

It hadn't changed in all the time they'd spent with each other, be it apart or together. It hadn't lessened through their fights or faded since they'd broken up. Lexie was oddly grateful for this deadlocked quality of her love for him, even if it tortured her at times. It was true, she knew that, and eventually she'd have to stop denying it to herself, him, and everyone else. Eventually, she'd have to come clean.

But eventually didn't have to be today or tomorrow.

As long as no one else knew, she was free to live in her own personal world of almost-attained dreams. She was free to recreate their damaged past and to predict a discarded future. She was free from everything and everyone else, just for a couple hours each night, and she took advantage of that freedom and went to the one place she always wanted to be and never wanted to leave: with him.

. . .

Not quite feeling ready to face reality, but ready to achieve her freedom once again, Lexie closes her eyes ten minutes later, ten minutes since she'd awoken in the middle of the night. The scene from her dream flickers for a moment, and she's suddenly terrified it's gone from her forever, much like he is now. She has the memories filed away, of course, but are they really enough to recreate it all? But then, just as her worries are about to skyrocket—the dream is back. His face flickers behind her eyelids, and by focusing on the virtually never-ending supply of details she'd recalled from her subconscious, she's able to solidify his image as she herself fades away.

Lexie falls asleep almost immediately, falling away from reality and back into Mark's arms, the place she wishes wasn't locked away in a dream.

Just before crossing over to full unconsciousness and joining hi m in her own personal heaven, she pauses a moment. Lexie Grey takes a second and makes a promise to herself that she'll tell him, one of these days, that nothing has changed. She had walked away from him months ago, but that didn't mean she couldn't still pluck up her courage sometime and walk back. That didn't mean she'd give up on him, or them, or what she still felt so strongly.

But even still, as she begins drifting off, a part of her hopes that that day will never come. A part of her hopes that she can just live in her dreams without facing reality, but even Lexie knows that taking that road would have dire consequences later on. It was easy enough now, to pretend in the darkness and explore the secret corners of her mind, but how long could this illusion really last? How long could she stand seeing him every day, possibly with other women, without blurting out those three words they'd said to each other countless times? How long could she lie to herself about wanting more and hold herself back from attaining the one thing she knew would make her truly happy?

Instead of worrying over the answer, though, Lexie lets go, feeling herself float away, and breaks the surface between reality and dreams, arriving back in her secluded haven just as she'd left it.

. . .

**_When she was just a girl,_**

**_She expected the world._**

**_But it flew away from her reach…_**

**_So she ran away in her sleep,_**

**_And dreamed of para—para—_**

**_Paradise,_**

_Para, para, Paradise…_

_Para, para, Paradise…_

**_Every time she closed her eyes._**

**_. . ._**

"Hey, where'd you go?"

"Hm?" Lexie murmurs, blinking awake. She feels a smile take place on her mouth involuntarily when Mark's face comes into focus. "Oh, hi."

"Hi," he smiles back. Lexie yawns, propping herself up in bed and adjusting the pillows behind her back. "Where'd you go?" He asks again.

"Where'd I go?"

"You spaced out and then fell asleep." He grins. "Did I wear you out or what?"

"Other way around," she smiles. "You were the one who had to call for a time-out last night."

"Not all of us can combine gymnastics and sex, Little Grey."

She shrugs. "Make whatever excuse you want, but just know that it's not my fault you can't keep up."

Even without looking at him, she can see the resolution set in on his face. She can hear the acceptance in his voice, a clear answer to the challenge that had been hiding beneath her words. "I can keep up," he states.

"Oh, can you?" She taunts, trying her best to hide the smile threatening to break out across her face.  
>His reply comes a couple moments later, whispered against the skin of her cheek. "I can." Her body twitches slightly at the feel of his lips on her skin, her muscles tensing in recent and abundant memories.<p>

His lips drift down her cheek to her neck, down the center of her chest, before his head comes to rest just above her abdomen. He glances up at her, letting his hands drift beneath her light camisole and skim over the soft, smooth skin of her stomach. "I can definitely keep up," he murmurs, holding her gaze as he leans down to kiss her stomach softly. Lexie sighs, closing her eyes and arching her back, pushing herself towards him. A second later, she immediately regrets the action as his hands turn less seductive and more ticklish on her skin.

"Stop!" She shouts in laughter, her back snapping forward to shove him away. "Ma—Mark, stop it!"

He grins, his fingers somehow making their way to her sensitive skin even though she's trying her best to shove him away. Her fits of laughter become so frequent and intense that when she manages to take a breath, it's like she's gasping for air.

"Stop," shouts in laughter. "Seriously, I can't breathe!"

"Oh, no problem," he replies calmly. "I know CPR."

"Stop, you stupid idiot! You're going to kill me and we haven't even gotten through day one of this honeymoon!"

"Admit to me I can keep up and we're good."

"Never," Lexie shouts, trying to spit out the word amongst her own hysterics.

"Never, huh?" He asks, crouching above her and pining her arms together with one hand while his other dances along her midsection.

"Stop, stop, stop!" She laughs, twisting this way and that beneath him.

"Just say the words," Mark replies easily.

"Fine!" She shouts finally. "Fine, you can keep up; I was kidding!"

He grins, letting go and of her hands and leaning away from her. "That wasn't so hard, now was it?"

Lexie doesn't reply, instead opting to eye him warily as she moves to the opposite edge of the bed. Mark just rolls his eyes at her antics. "You got what you deserved, Lex. I'm done now."

"You can't be trusted," she replies with narrowed eyes, hugging her knees to her chest.

"Oh, for god's sake," Mark mutters, moving across the bed towards her. He holds out his hand as a peace offering. "Truce?"

Lexie stares at him for a moment before rearranging herself to sit cross-legged and taking his hand. She shakes it, all the while keeping an eye on him. "Truce." They stare at each other in silence for a moment before Lexie speaks again. "So…" She begins slowly, attempt to look him in the eye and tear her vigilant gaze away from his hands. She stares at him, trying to stop thinking he'll use her own laughter against her again. "What are we doing today?"

"Well…" He trails off, glancing to his watch before turning his wrist towards her and showing her the time: five AM. "It seems like we have some time to kill… Breakfast won't be ready for an hour, at least, so…" He looks up, catching her gaze. He gives her a small smile before tilting his head backwards briefly and holding out his hand again. "Come over here, you."

"Hm," Lexie smiles, already moving towards him. He takes her happily into his arms, smiling upwards as she settles her body above his. "Damn these early hours we're forced to wake up to all year," she says, leaning down to kiss him. "I could be sleeping." Her lips drift to his neck. "Whatever shall we do with all this time on our hands?"

"I have more than a few ideas," Mark smiles, tilting his head back until she lifts hers to meet her eyes. He removes his hands from her ribcage, instead reaching up to cradle her face delicately, as if she were a fragile artifact he was charged with keeping safe.

She smiles down at him, and presses her head lower and more snugly into his grip. "More than a few ideas?" She asks softly, reaching out to run her hand through his hair. He nods, leaning up to kiss her lips. His tongue slips into her mouth for the briefest moment before he pulls back. "More than a few tricks up your sleeve?" She questions with a smile.

"Oh, of course," he smiles back, pulling her more securely down to his level. His hands still enclose her face, and he guides her lips to his, kissing them lovingly. "Come with me to paradise," he murmurs between kisses, staring up at her.

Lexie opens her eyes at his words, smiling lazily at him as her hands reach out to cup his cheeks as well. Her fingers caress his skin softly as her eyes meet his tender gaze. "I'm already there," she whispers in reply, sealing their lips together again and letting her eyes drift closed in nothing short of pure bliss.

**_. . ._**

**_She dreamed of_**

_Para—para—**paradise**__._

**_She dreamed of_**

_Para—para—**paradise**__,_

**_Every time she closed her eyes._**

**_. . ._**

**_This could be _**_para—para—_

**_Paradise_**

**_Oh, this could be_**_ para—para—_

**_Paradise._**

_Oh, oh, oh._

**_This could be paradise._**

**_. . ._**

_Author's Note: Please review. I tried not to make this one too sad, because I feel like all I do is bombard you guys with depressing fics, and you all need a reprieve from the sadness just as much as I do._

_Tell me how my try for happiness went in a review please! :)_


End file.
